we all love to play

we all love to play, dont we? in purpose or not, we play all the time.
we play with our ego, with someone's heart, someone's pride, and our pride, till we lose.
how can you tell me you want me back when you are the one who let me go.
when you are the one who asked me to move on ?

and when i did, and seems to be happy with my life you come back and say the things im longing to hear 2 months ago?
but not now. not when im over you, not when im happy with someone new, not when im ready
to leave you.

dont you think its a tad bit late?
its funny and ironic, hes back when you dont want him anymore. how i wish he would say all the things he need to say yesterday..

there's a thousand hint for all this time

i've ignored the hints he had given me.
simple thing, when we made love, he never seems like he's really into me. he was just focus on the sex, its totally different.
when we were together, i can tell that he's into me, but after all the rocky road we've been through, he's just changed.
and its obvious. i was just too stupid to ignored all the signs.

i should've known that he wasnt that into me.
i should've known.

1st night

welcoming me to the new place. alright, its all settled and done. im on my own now. no more him, no more sleeping around his stuff, no more his face in the morning.
i should be happy for this shouldn't i? it makes it easier for me to move on, but turns out, its the opposite way. i hate it.
i feel weak, i feel tired, i feel like i don't know where i'm going, i know, this is not going to be like this forever, but right now, thats just how it feels.
i miss him, i miss us, i miss the old me when i was with him. i was like the happiest person, always smiling, always happy no matter what happen.
i just smile whenever im with him.

and now, look at me, all sad and gloomy, and i hate the mask im wearing now. i hate pretending that i am fine, because im not!
but tell me, what can i do to change this? i can do nothing. i won't change his mind. nobody will ever change someone's mind unless they want to. i've done all i can. im sure i did. does it change the situation? no.

i don't know how long its going to last? i dont know when will i finally moving on..
no promises, but the only thing that i can do is enjoying the pain and let my tears falls down
no denying, no more pretending...
i believe time will heal.
but lord knows how i love that guy, how im still longing for him.

and i have to get use to this now. i should be over you. and enjoying my empty space.
sooner or later everything will be ok, yes?

well, i hope so.. :)

sleep alone

i dont like it but i don't have any other option. its just the emptiness and this single bed and single moon.
meanwhile i know you are happy somewhere, and i admirer you who can get thru this easily
way too easy. oh wait , its because you are the one who let me go, and you are the one who just walk away

good for you, you dont have to wear my shoes. you don't feel sad or empty or even left behind,
you don't miss me the way i missed you. so yeah sure its easy for you.
then im getting sick and tired missing you like hell, when you don't even care about me.

how unfair is that huh? well, correct me if im wrong, but its always easy for them who's left, not the one who's been left.
i wish i could sing no regret, i wish i could be the one who left you. i wish i never met you.

i wish i never met you. so i dont have to be like this. a broken hearted lady, who's trying to survive every single day.
i wish i was bad to you and our relationship. i wish i wasn't that into you.
so i could just play you like a yo-yo just like what you did to me.

im sorry, but i do regret it. i regret the day i let you step in to my life.
i regret the day i fall for you, i regret i ever trusted you.
i regret every moment of it.
i regret you.

now im just gonna sleep alone, and smile .
goodnight moon...
hope you are gone by the time i wake up in the morning

d

you and me

oh!

lets..